The family becomes more involved in the choice of a mate although the woman is given a choice.
This part of the Native American dating custom is usually done with a special flute called a Courting flute.
The young man will play his flute until the woman he wants comes out to see him.
As the Crane dance went on usually a young man would see a woman that did strike his fancy.
Unlike our current dating customs, the native American dating customs required that the young man speak to his mother who then would speak to the mother of the girl he was interested in.
I am 1/8 Tsalagi and I fell more connected with that part of my heratige than any other in my blood. As long as I remember, I love Native American guys. I feel part of me is strongly connected to my father's heritage.